50 Funniest Bollywood Dialogues Of All Time

Imagine this: After having a hard week at work, you finally get to enjoy your weekend. You turn on the TV to tune into one of those old-timey movie channels that play Sooryavansham on weekdays. To your surprise, it has this comedy on that you watched years ago as a kid. You realise that all the jokes still land and you cannot stop laughing. Sounds perfect, doesn’t it? Over the years, Bollywood has been able to produce some pure comedy gold that just never gets old. No matter how many times you watch these movies, they always bring a smile to your face. We bring you 30 Funniest Bollywood Dialogues that always make us laugh.

Also read: 35 All Time Best Bollywood Comedy Movies You Should Watch

1. What we have all felt once inside.

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2. This is not how Indian marriages work.

3. Barabar ka hissa.

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4. I mean, I’d totally pay to watch Kareena Kapoor do nothing.

5. This, on the other hand, is exactly the way Indian marriages work.

6. Confusion nahi hona chahiye bhagwan ji ko.

7. They’d probably charge extra for the thali.

8. The mind boggles.

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9. If all thieves announced their arrivals like this, the world would be crime-free.

10. Na tumhari na meri.

11. Always focus on the food.

12. The funniest fish fry.

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13. Nobody crosses bhai.

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14. This perfect reply for judgmental aunties.

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15. Me after PUBG got banned.

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16. That one friend who’s hooked on a girl who doesn’t know he exists.

17. But no, you only care about yourself.




18. King among men.

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19. Why be nice when life’s not?

20. A sight for sore eyes.

21. When you ask your little brother to ask mummy to let you eat pizza but mummy doesn’t shout at him like she would at you.

22. Me to the one guy in class who attends the lecture during a mass bunk.

23. I mean, probably. Yeah.

24. When you have had a traumatic school life and nothing fazes you.

25. First-time criminals. Pssh.

26. At least she’s clear about her priorities.

27. Zyada hoshiyaar mat bano, thik hai?

28. How does an induction motor start?

29. A father knows his son best.

30. A worthy criterion of development. 

31. Babu bhaiya strikes back.

32. Baaki humare saath aao.

33. Peesing, and peesing, and peesing…

34. A born lover.

35. When an optimist falls in love with a pessimist.

36. An important note.

37. Bhai is so strong, he can change human anatomy.

38. A conference of losers.

39. The warmth of a father’s love.

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40. So meta.

41. Putting your degree to good use.

42. This is what happens when you do not register for gifts.

43. An introduction that puts all other introductions to shame.

44. An unlikely metaphor, but if Kafka can do it, so can we.

45. Deception and lies.

46. The sad truth.

47. I want what he’s having.

48. Fair enough.

49. Who are these people who successfully execute their Goa Rishikesh plans?

50. When you’re the middle child and nobody likes you.

Did you like our list of the funniest Bollywood dialogues? Comment below to tell us your favourite!

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